Rieubanian Angel

a site for my poetry.....

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Location: IL, United States

I'm not exactly crazy about myself like most people think, but whatever

Sunday, December 31, 2006

my only sanctuary

the anger that surrounds me,
i fear it constantly...
fear stems from this anger,
growing larger,
and more insistant each moment it lasts...
fear of the anger has sent me to my solitude,
my sanctuary...
the only place i can think...
the darkness of my bedroom,
that comforting feeling of being alone...
all for nothing,
for when i emerge,
the anger strikes at me again,
with its vicious claws,
its bottomless pit of despair...
and i fear it even more...
i withdraw again to my only sanctuary
but
unfortunately
my sanctuary is not to last
i will have to leave it again
to dispell my thoughts and gain more fear
for
in order to learn,
one must take risks
one must face the impending darkness of this fear...
the fear of the anger
anger of you.
anger of myself...

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Not At All

Now
can you see through my facade
its seamless walls
the door glued tightly shut
painted to seem happy
but behind it
the tears defy me
but behind it
you sympathize for me
and i can't stand that
not at all
i seriously want no pity
i want to be understood
yes
but no sympathy
not from you
of all people you can't see
who i am behind the wall
you don't see my tears
or my shatered soul
you can't see who i am
not at all
but you turned me down
even when i offered
to open that door
what crazy maddness do you speak
when you won't even listen to me
my fragile heart broke
because of you
otherwise,
not at all

Gone With The Love

Love is natural
Love is not our decision
Who to love is destiny
And we cannot be forced
To love who we can't
Is a crime against nature
When we love one of our likeness
How dare they try to stop us
From loving who we love
And those from loving us
Love is not trivial
Like it was in the past
Love was a fairytale
It would never last
But to love from the heart
And sacrifice ourselves to love
Today it is at second priority
Ranked below work
Love should be first
On our list we have
Dissappearing so much lately
Are the revelations of late
As we try to understand
This sad nation of ours
A tale of love
Forever remains untold
To never look back on our dark past
the time has finally come... at last
So please, join me, hear me out
And will you feel my guilt and my sorrow

Sit Idly By

dont you call me naieve
my heart wont lie to me
yet your heart lies to you
and lets you stay unaware
of those feelings locked inside
the fragile heart of you
and my heart screams in pain
as you sit idly by
and i miss your warmth
that you never had
that you never let me feel
i will never get the chance
to hold you in my arms
you never wanted to share
yourself with anyone
but my heart will not give up
my mind will not give in
i will keep shaking the tree to make the dew drops fall
because love is forever
love is forever and all
why do you dislike
the one might love you
when all reasons are pathetic
and love will prevail
secrets will be revealed
so don't you call me naieve
for my heart is so dear
a heart is a flower
and love is the pollen

My Clueless Heart

touching my dry skin
like mid-summer rain
your smile is bright
and yet you set me on fire
burning my lips
like the salt from the sea
your happiness is annoying
when we see our future
the future of our pathetic selces
but yet you hold me close
not in reality
never in the flesh
will you touch me
nevertheless hold me
but you slightly notice me
why do you see me with your ever-closed eyes?
my clueless heart
sees them as open
and makes my heart race
but i can't get near you
your heart is closed to me
why can't you see me?
when i cry out your name
and your heart says no
why do you avoid me
when the heart must decide
and in my mind
you touch my dry skin
like mid-summer rain

Naruto Uzumaki, The Confidence

Listen to me
Listen to me
I am stronger than you think
Dattebayo!
I am a person too
But I've been lonely
For so, so long
And yet you still see me as
An unimportant nusiance
But I will be important
Dattebayo!
Now I am a genin
And I will prove to you all
That I am the strongest
The strongest of you all
Dattebayo!
I will be Hokage some day
And I will defeat Sasuke
I always try my hardest
And in three days
What took the Fourth
Three years to complete
My name is
Naruto Uzumaki
The best ninja around
Dattebayo!
So, listen to me
Listen to me
Can I have some ramen now?

Sasuke And Itachi Uchiha, The Hatred

finding the life
that you gave up
to see what you could do
to prove your limits
to show your power
careless,
you slaughtered them
in front of my eyes
you made me cry
using your new eyes
you killed them again
showing me in my mind
their bloody selves falling
falling in front of me
our family all bloody
the shuriken in the walls
the kunai in the door
the broken glass
of our family name
on the wooden floor
all to attain your new eyes
what the hell were you thinking
when you killed them that day
and you stole my future
you stole my appreciation of you
now it is your turn, brother,
to die by my hands
and lie in your blood
as i steal your life away

Keri-ana

now i cry alone in my world of fears
crying all night until the dawn breaks
now i see who i was ment to be
why do i want to kiss him?
why dio i want to be in his arms?
why do i want to kiss him,
when all i need is his smile to survive
why do i want impossible things?

terrors grasping my every word
my fears are long overdue
now find me alone in my room
crying the night away

why do i want to kiss him?
why do i want to be in his arms?
why do i want to kiss him,
when all i need is his smile to survive.

because i want him forever
to help ease my pain inside
to make my fears disperse

terrors grasping my every word
my fears are long overdue
now find me alone in my room
crying the night away

what i wouldnt give to sleep for a night
to rid me of my nightmares
but i still want to kiss him
to ease my heavy chains

because i want him forever
to help ease my pain inside
to make my fears disperse

his hand around my waist
is this a dream
or is it reality
help me understand these things

now i see who i was ment to be
and i still cant see the sun

Saturday, December 02, 2006

The Past Is Real

The Past is Real (Because) by Spork
Inspired by Papa Roach

Our scars remind us
That the past is real
I tear my heart open
Just to feel
And our scars
Show our past
Filled with war
Filled with regret
And our scarred hearts
Cried throughout the sad nights
Death is our acquaintance
Met with only too often
To be afraid of her
And her black cat of destiny
A painful sting in m side
Heartache lives evermore
We dwell in ourselves
Living every day
To our utmost limit
Wandering for hours
Ever day
Asking ourselves
“Will we be here again”
Because we lie to everyone
We are not from here
We came from somewhere
So far away
And I tear my heart open
Just to feel
The life and the love
That you falsify
And I can’t help it or deny
That my heart lies to me
And your soul breaks
Like glass in the rain
And my painful heartache
From saying goodbye
And life long courage
Breaks down over the years
Handshakes
Hearts break
As the land burns slowly
Through our slow death
Ever in the after
Our sins and the sinned
Crying for water
To quench our thirst
And it just won’t come
And our hearts fade
And we start to realize
That we are not ourselves
Until we really die
Both inside
And outside
The past is forever real
And you can’t go home.

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